Into the Wood
After our long walk on the ledge, Todd and I meandered along the inner wood trails—the guts of the forest. Nearly naked they were, the trees having shed their garments of leaves, bare and vulnerable facing winter winds and snow blankets coming. Earth floor carpeted in dry and dead, I dragged my feet because I […]
Life on the Ledge
One of my best friends in the whole wide world read my last blog post. When I saw her she said something like this . . . Your words were lovely. You were really vulnerable in that piece. That’s what I remember her saying. And then I started getting anxious, again. I get anxious because […]
The Fix and the Fixer
I started my reply to her email the other day like this . . . My dear friend! I can feel your aching heart! I wish I could wave a wand and make it all better. But we both know better. I can’t. You can’t. We just can’t make all these huge problems go away. […]
Greatest Expectations
My first memory from childhood was of myself in a seersucker jumpsuit my grandmother had sewn for me. I was four years old, laying on my stomach in our backyard, hunting for a four-leafed clover. My sister was ill. Very, very ill. I was looking for luck. Mom and Dad arranged for Dad’s mom to […]
God’s Not Dead
It’s June. High school graduation parties are in full swing. It’s summer. We have four weddings in two months coming up—one right here on our farm on June 28 with horses in the background and wildflowers on the tables, tucked into vintage blue Mason jars. Pinterest perfection with a Jane Austen Pride and Prejudice ambience. […]
Desert of Life
Flying into Tucson, I looked down and saw brown. Lots of brown ground with not much that I would call pretty—not like Wisconsin in the spring where budding trees splash green against robin’s egg blue sky, and purple and yellow are pushing through with crocus and daffodil. I have come to the desert. Dry and dusty. The mountains blur in the haze […]
Catty
How to suffer well so we can help others suffer well . . . Catching barn cats, crating, and transporting them to the vet were calendar to-dos last week for annual examinations and vaccinations. Howling their laments, I drove all three of them to the one who knows better than I what they need to […]
An Uphill Climb
Think you’re not disabled? Think again . . . We went away together, my husband and I. We left our problems, our concerns, our constant stress that never seems to let up for long. Because when one is caring for three kids, now 22, 20, and 15—all with a myriad of permanent cognitive disabilities stemming […]
Thanks Giving in Pain
Our farm has been dusted in powder sugar snow and flakes are flying as I write. I love the climate changes here in Wisconsin—the unique beauty of every season. The horses are now blanketed for the harsh northwest winds. The cats are snuggled in their polar-fleeced hay igloo in the barn. The tractor has been […]
Seeds of Courage
Courage. That’s what I need. And comfort. My heart hurts. And rest. I’m soul tired. Courage. Comfort. Rest. Where do I go? I went to the lake—to our cottage on Lake Michigan, just ten miles north of our home. I went alone after church on Sunday because I craved solitude and quiet more than I’ve […]
Legs and Muck
She stands in the drenched paddock after the thunderstorm, fork in hands, picking horse manure. We get a lot of production here on the farm. They say an average horse drops nine tons a year. Do the math. We have four average horses. We get lots of time to think while we’re mucking stalls and picking […]
Baring the Soul
I have decided to blog only two days per week for a while—Tuesdays and Thursdays—as I will be investing heart and time in another writing project since returning from Alaska. If you haven’t already subscribed to my blog and would like to receive notifications of each new post in your email, simply scroll down to the bottom of […]