The Mix of Mother’s Day Emotions
On the cusp of this Mother’s Day, I remember my worst Mother’s Day. Sometimes, I still wake in a sweat, heart pounding, reaching for the phone. “I need to call my mom,” I think. And then, in an instant, I remember reality. I put the phone down on my nightstand. In 2022, My mother was […]
Finding Meaning & Hope in Life’s Burns
On a sunny spring morning with nearly no breeze, I stood in the still-dormant grass of the ditch just a half-mile up from our home. I watched that old, white farmhouse burn. Flames swirled orange out of every window and door. I felt the heat on my face from across the street. Our 25-year-old son […]
How I Planted A Garden of Joy
Last week, I planted a garden. Not just any garden. Not a garden for me. But the garden ended up being for me, in a way. Maybe for you too? Here’s the start of my story. Please join me over at Different Dream Living for the conclusion. I have this friend around my age. […]
How to Consume Life-Giving Lamb
I ate the lamb shank—the lamb I ordered—Sunday night. For those of you who are vegetarians, I’ll try to be sensitive. Truth is, I found that shank extremely tender and tasty. Still, I wonder if I ought to partake of an animal that was “sacrificed” for my sake. Why can’t I even eat a tasty […]
What We All Need to Know About Respect and Servanthood
We rolled slowly along the street, meandering our way to what would soon be two new graves dug in Arlington National Cemetery—two of 400,000 already grassed green. Our vehicle stopped. Six men in crisp Army uniform stood in front of us, facing the awning where we would memorialize and pray for our friend’s father, Sgt. […]
Packs and The Lone Wolf—How to Deal with the Deadly, Including Ourselves
Electric races lightening fast through my nerves around 9:30 p.m. A pack of coyotes starts yipping and barking. They are close. Very close. Right on the edge of the densely wooded ravine next to our log home. My heart thumps hard in my chest. The eerie sounds of the pack grip me as I stand […]
Weathering the Storms
I stand on the balcony of our west-facing library and see the young pumpkin vines beginning to flower yellow. My eyes scan the rows of tender tomatoes and marigolds two weeks old, crying for relief from the oppressive heat and hard winds that can turn soil to dust and parch leaves crisp. Their vulnerable stems […]
When Mother’s Day Reminds You of Death—The Way to Find Life
Mother’s Day, 2002 I called my mother to make sure she received the dozen red carnations I sent as a surprise. “They’re gorgeous! But you said you weren’t sending me flowers for Mother’s Day this year because of the bench.” “I know. But you’ve always told me flowers should be given to the living, not […]
Dust to Dust And The Peace that Comes with Letting Go
They carried her to the altar, their mother. They carried her, all ash in a small wooden box. They covered her with a white cloth, embroidered with a cross. A cross. Where Christ paid for our ultimate reconciliation—restored relation between holy God and sinner. Between sinners and sinners . . . All watched […]
How Can I Trust God?
She told me . . . I don’t know if I can trust God. I’m afraid He’ll hurt me like I’ve been hurt before. This young woman, sitting in my office years ago, was one of many seeking therapy. They had been hurt badly in relationship from their earliest memories on. People who professed […]
Left and Right Wings (Raw Writing–Unapologetically Unedited)
I flew to St. Martin on the day of the presidential inauguration. Leaving my home at four in the morning with a negative six degrees Fahrenheit freezing my bare ankles, I drove forty-five minutes south and parked my car in Remote Lot A. Thankfully, the airport shuttle had just arrived at the shelter. A young […]
Sacrificial Love and Letting Yourself Be Held By the Very Able Hand of God
Anne asked me. Said she needed me to come. Her past few phone messages in my voicemail sounded different—not quite desperate but certainly bold in expressing her request. “I need to see you.” Five strong words. Does a new diagnosis of Alzheimer’s do this to a person? When you’re 69? Do you suddenly wonder how […]